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Rabu, 08 Juli 2009

am I PMS today??


I`m started my day today with a bright spirit and cheerful,wore a new clothes just for learning something new . this morning we continued learning about all of disease of respiratory tract . .. not all actually, maybe half...=)..Im happy because my sit position really in front of doctor so i can keep my eye contact with him when he started teaching us. sometimes it`s really helped me because eye contact helps me to understand what he says and I can read all his movement include lips and body language...hehhee its fun right??..=P..

after PA class, its free time.. actually supposed to be microbe class but Dr.Wani has something to settle back so she can`t present in the class today .. it`s made class noisy and people started chat with their group include me..hehe... first , all move smoothly.. we chated together in the group but when she talked about something make me hurt and felt guilty I can`t stand with it.. yesss.. that`s my fault..really my fault but I asked apologize from her a few month ago, after we were took examination.But what I can`t accepted ,she told about that event in front of me and my friends . Maybe she told and storied just for fun and funny things but I really can`t accept because I felt like humiliated...and she told again, she never believe me again in front everybody . if she doesn`t wanna believe me anymore just because of the small things ..that is OK!..fine..!

I don`t know why I m very sensitive today...thats why i asked I PMS..??..suppose to be today im start period day...but I have not yet...that`s fine. maybe it`s late a few days. I wanted to push all from my head in front her but it will make things horrible and worst and that`s why I keep my mouth. Because I know myself once I open my mouth all the things , da bad thing out and make people hurts more. So let me hurt lonely then all people hurt and make environment ruined because of me.
We back home because class started late, on 12.30 pm. but I decided don`t want go to class. I need a time to release my sadness and get a sleep. yeahh..true ..what happened in the class made me cried.. sometimes we need to cry and that`s what i have done. I hope after I cried I can forget all the things that happened in the class this morning but I keep remember that things again until now.

I opened YM just for asked dayah , to help me buy online air Asia ticket . what J had saw is, that`s a several offline message from her, juz asked apologizes from me... maybe it will take time me to forgive her. ....

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